This is the Wrestlemania the represents the worst of the WWE today; bad booking decisions, poor storytelling, and the lack of character build-up. This card for a Wrestlemania was so poor that they had to bring The Rock back as a special host of the show, not to wrestle. You know, Wrestlemania 27 is just like Iron Man 2, where that movie basically is a commercial to The Avengers movie. Wrestlemania 27 really is a commercial of the following Wrestlemania. That is really the worst thing you can ever do to a professional wrestling’s biggest show. You had all the time and build-up to actually do that for any other WWE Pay-Per-View but to do it on the most anticipated show is some of the worst things you can decide to do and this Wrestlemania has an infamous reputation of being really that bad! And the worst part of all is that I’m going to have to describe why this show in its entirety is bad!
And before this show even got started, this is like Wrestlemania 25 all over again where the matches that deserved to be in the main card to create new stars in the biggest stage of them all ends up being held in the dark match like Sheamus-Daniel Bryan match. I could care less about 23 man battle royal but for the fact that Sheamus & Bryan had to be buried into dark match is one of the all time worst booking decision ever! Already it shot itself in the foot and gave itself the first nail on the coffin!
Edge (c) (with Christian) vs. Alberto Del Rio (with Ricardo Rodriguez and Brodus Clay) – World Heavyweight Championship – And here I am showing you why the booking decision still suffers greatly after all of these years of the WWE. You’ve made the second most prestigious title in the WWE and the Royal Rumble winner to be the opening match of the card. I can’t even describe how much credibility has lost with the World title being so pushed down like that. It’s one thing that it was sandwiched in the card but to make it an opener… who books this shit? And you can even see that Edge didn’t care for headlining Wrestlemania anymore because you can see he was in a lot of pain while ADR was so ambitious and anxious to make his Wrestlemania debut but didn’t deserve this treatment of having a great matchup in the show to end up being an opener. All this match did was just to have Edge beat ADR and smash his limousine with Christian. Nothing in this match was at all surprising nor did it felt any different from what we seen from Edge and ADR’s previous matches. Ridiculous! And it’s even worse that this is Edge’s last Wrestlemania match that even puts more insult to injury!
Match Score: 1/5
Cody Rhodes vs. Rey Mysterio – And now we come to the only good match on the card because these two gave a lot of effort as dance partners. Cody Rhodes had an awesome gimmick where he pretends to have a broken nose to wear that protected plastic face mask that is used as a weapon, technically. He used it perfectly against Rey Mysterio in this match because they both were lightweights and the leaps, flips and slams that they threw in this match was a lot of fun and handled creatively. Sometimes, I wish Cody still kept this gimmick because it really worked! The mask is the plot device of this very match and it was used to his advantage, so Rey had to figure out how to avoid getting hit with the mask or try to remove it. Fortunately, Cody’s mask gets knocked off in the fracas, and Rey hits the 619. It’s like Brutus Beefcake all over again. Rey dons Cody’s mask and hits a series of running headbutts. Nice! A diving headbutt gets two. Cody’s support is growing at this point. He rips off Rey’s kneebrace and blocks a tope with it. This is really one of the most creative match I’ve ever seen in a Wrestlemania and unfortunately this is the only good match on this card
Match Score: 4/5
Kane, Big Show, Santino Marella, and Kofi Kingston vs. The Corre (Wade Barrett, Ezekiel Jackson, Justin Gabriel, and Heath Slater) – Both teams got in the ring, some moves happened, and Big Show knocked out Heath Slater of the Corre. That was it. This was almost too short to be considered a ‘bathroom break’. Even worse, this is the burial of Barrett, Jackson, Gabriel, and Slater who were supposed to be rising stars for the WWE and they’ve ruined that opportunity of making them all bigger stars. If this match is only going to give me under 2 minutes of show, why should I care.
Match Score: 1/5
Randy Orton vs. CM Punk – What as surprise! Another Randy Orton match that continues to bore the audience. Honestly, the feud between Orton and Punk was some of the most uninspiring and lousy match up that you can put with two stars. There was no story, no stipulation, and ultimately no purpose of this match. I mean, Punk tried his damnedest to make it a worthy match, but for the sake that Orton just didn’t’ care at this point and give us the same damn moves that he always offered is the same response that I normally give to many of his matches. It was a slow, dried out match that had no storytelling, not many surprises, and worst of all had the wrong guy to win the match. I still can’t believe that the WWE is supposed to create new stars and it delayed CM Punk from being the star that he now is today when he’s supposed to pushed sooner. Just what in fuck’s name is Orton’s victory amount to? Absolutely nothing!
Match Score: 2/5
Michael Cole (with Jack Swagger) vs. Jerry Lawler (With Jim Ross) – Ladies and Gentlemen, allow me to introduce to you the worst match of the whole show and it’s an incredibly painful one to sit through. Dealing with Michael Cole’s heel commentaries was some of the most painful and agonizing commentaries I’ve ever seen. I mean, sure I was once a fan of his commentary when he was teamed up with Tazz in Smackdown back in the brand extension, but seeing him bash every wrestler on NXT, had to protect himself with bullet proof class in his own commentary table, and even constantly argue with his commentary colleagues was the time where I had to put the mute button more times than not. I still get that feeling each time I hear Michael Cole commentating nowadays, but this is the WORST booking of a match that I’ve ever seen. Nobody wants to see washed up has-beens to duke it out in the ring. We’ve seen Bret Hart vs. Vince McMahon that proved that, but the WWE just didn’t get it through their heads and had Lawler and Cole to wrestle in a Fucking Wrestlemania match. How on blue blazes of fucks did this headline in this card but the Sheamus-Daniel Bryan match was a dark match? It was bad enough to see Vince McMahon to oversell Bret Hart’s moves in Wrestlemania 26, but Cole just over did it at the point where it embarrassed not only the company, but the whole Wrestling industry! Nothing in this match felt at all impacting and everything done in this match was poorly executed. The whole crowd in the stadium shouted out boring as the match continues and not even Jim Ross and Booker T could even save the commentary. Lawler applied his own version of the ankle lock. Cole tapped immediately. Austin hilariously asked, “Do…you…give…up.” Cole screamed that he did. Austin eventually called for the bell to give the win to Lawler via submission. Cole and Swagger split. Austin’s music played and he handed a couple of beers to Lawler for a celebration. Booker T entered the ring and wanted to party with them. Booker performed the Spinaroonie. Austin laughed and gave him a beer. Booker took a swig, and Austin gave him the Stunner… why?! Who cares. With Austin and Lawler in the ring together, the anonymous general manager email chime sounded… yeah forgot about that stupid gimmick of a computer storyline? Well, that was one stupid storytelling device that I DON’T want to remember. Mathews stood up and read a message for the GM, who ruled that Austin overstepped his boundaries as the referee, and Lawler lost the match by disqualification. Cole, who had some blood in his mouth, was lying on the ramp with a big smile on his face. Lawler went to ringside and protested to Mathews. He eventually threw Josh inside the ring, where Austin hit Mathews with a Stunner for a big pop. Austin hopped on his four wheeler and headed backstage, leaving Lawler to join his longtime partner Ross on commentary… And to think that the WWE think we actually cared. FUCK YOU, WWE! And FUCK THIS MATCH UP THE ASS!!!
Match Score: -1/5 (The Lowest Score I can ever give)
The Undertaker vs. Triple H – I’m sorry everyone, but this match is really not good. I mean it was a decent brawl but the whole purpose of this match was the fact that Hunter is jealous of Shawn Michael’s wrestlemania moments with the Undertaker in two previous Wrestlemanias and he want to be part of it. The WWE is acting like this is the first time that HHH and Taker are facing off in Wrestlemania, but they want you to forget that they had already faced off in Wrestlemania 17. If you ask me, you should watch that match instead because this match here, while it did they to tell a story in this hardcore match, the problem is is that Triple H is not that agile and athletic so there are no surprises in this match. Undertaker was either in real bad shape or he was kayfabing it so they can have a rematch in the following Wrestlemania. And that’s what I hate about this match, no matter how much they’ve tried, what matters is that Triple H gets a rematch the following Wrestlemania because Shawn Michaels did it… Triple H is so full of himself that I can’t describe how much I hate what this match represents. I especially hate the finish where if the HHH character wanted to “end” the streak so badly, how come he’s ordering him to stay down and Undertaker recover? You can really tell that Triple H was waiting for Taker to give him an opening submission because he was not ready for this match. Obviously, Triple H gets himself into a Hell’s Gate submission hold because Undertaker couldn’t get himself up and Triple H had to tap. I hate the fact that Triple H had to oversell for Undertaker like he’s just as in bad shape as Undertaker while ‘Taker himself was already hurt. This match wasn’t at all good. It was a half an hour dirty fight that could NEVER be as good as the Undertaker-Shawn Michaels matches in the previous two Wrestlemania matches.
Match Score: 2/5
John Morrison, Trish Stratus, and Snooki vs. Dolph Ziggler and LayCool (Layla andMichelle McCool) (with Vickie Guerrero) – Sigh, another match stipulation that has a celebrity involvement. This was around the time when Jersey Shore was popular and they had to get Snooki (really? Who uses that name) and get her in this match with Trish Stratus. Snooki tagged into the match and was greeted with loud boos from the crowd. She ended up hitting the springboard elbow move in the corner. She did another cartwheel and splashed McCool for the pin. The cast of Tough Enough was shown seated in prime seats in the crowd… So if Trish’s team won the match, what really was there to gain for this match? Absolutely nothing.
Match Score: 0/5
The Miz (c) (with Alex Riley) vs. John Cena – WWE Championship – Ladies and gentlemen, allow me to introduce you to the second worst main event of all time, not just Wrestlemania. I’ve reviewed really bad Wrestlemania main events, but this is so bad that it’s clearly advertisement for the next Wrestlemania because the Rock and John Cena kept focusing on each other that The Miz is not even recognized in this match. That is not good when the company is supposed to create new stars just to have someone like the Miz as a second thought as the tension between Rock and Cena became the main focus of the match. Because of this stupid focus of Cena and Rock instead of Cena and Miz is why Miz is pushed so backwards to below mid-card. Miz went from anti-establishment with a natural edge to his character (yes, The Miz) to a cookie-cutter, WWE-formula, weak heel. As soon as creative started paying attention to him he lost a lot of his luster. At first it was okay: He used to call out John Cena and when the (injured) superstar no-showed, Miz would claim the win by forfeit. This lasted all the way up until the 2009 Great American Bash pay-per-view (PPV) when he lost to Cena in five minutes. He lost again in a squash on Raw and shuffled down to mid-card obscurity. He never recovered his fan support. Then, after they had killed him, the creative powers at WWE naturally decided to do something with him. They made him the mentor of NXT’er Daniel Bryan. This only pissed us off more because by now The Miz had become one-dimensional and stale, his in-ring skills had never improved and he was “mentoring” an indie superstar. With fans sufficiently sick of him, the WWE decided the time was ripe to put the title on him. He cashed in his Money in the Bank briefcase and won the richest prize in the industry. He held the title high and proclaimed himself the greatest champ ever. Even despite the fact that he beat Cena in this match with the help from the Rock, The Rock’s involvement in this match and aftermath couldn’t save it, instead it worsen it. Having Rock attack both Cena and Miz because there was nothing more to add to this show really shows why this whole card was horrible! If you actually made me want to watch Bam Bam Bigelow vs. Lawrence Laylor in Wrestlemania 11, that should tell you how bad this main event is in comparison to that main event. This match was just garbage and the worst possible way you can finish a show, period!
Match Score: -1/5
Is it no wonder why this Wrestlemania is one of the worst of all time? I never could imagine another Wrestlemania to be as bad as Wrestlemania 9, but how foolish of me to think that because The Rock is involved in this show doesn’t mean squat. This Wrestlemania should have created stars and make a new era, but if the only good match was an average mid-card match up with Cody Rhodes and Rey Mysterio show how little to no effort was even put in this show. This is the only Wrestlemania that I can’t put myself through without having to feel the pain that it caused me when I first ordered the PPV. The booking structure was already a disaster on paper, but even worse is that they had to go through with this crap and make it the worst thing ever. How dare they make this Wrestlemania a commercial hype for the next Wrestlemania because that’s what other WWE PPV’s are for and this should never be the show that does the same as the other. The card structure was ridiculous having the World title with Edge and ADR to be the opening match. There are just so many bad matches in this card and the Jerry Lawler vs. Michael Cole match was some of the most pointless wrestling matchup’s the I’ve ever seen booked in a Wrestlemania. You want to make a show that everyone care to watch and if even your Main Event couldn’t even make that many people care, then it’s a reason why the professional wrestling business is at the state that it is. This Wrestlemania represents the worst aspects of WWE not giving a fuck. Some say that The New Generation era was somehow the worst times in the WWE, well at least that era actually cared to create stars. The PG era was all about the Breakfast Club playing it safe and control everything within their dominance. Don’t waste your time on this show, instead, skip over to Wrestlemania 28 because it’s the polar opposite from the awfulness of this wrestling show. And because this card wanted you to get pumped up for the next Wrestlemania, it shows that you should never look back at this one!
The Top Lister’s score for Wrestlemania 27
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